apophenic dreams.

"Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in a casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable."

- C.S. Lewis

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Permalink behindtintedglass: I recognized the quote even before I recognized the picture itself.  And I suddenly remembered why. I think one of the primary reasons why I had loved “House, M.D.” was precisely because, for quite some time, it was the only show that I felt had a distinct connection to and relevance with Sherlock Holmes, given that that the creator of the show, David Shore, openly admitted that Dr. Gregory House and Dr. James Wilson were patterned directly after Sherlock Holmes and John Watson.  And it’s questions like these, posed by Dr. Remy Hadley/Thirteen, that spark the same questions I’d like to ask Sherlock Holmes himself. There’s a hint of truth in what Thirteen is saying that I think is also applicable to Holmes.  In “The Adventure of the Copper Beeches” we hear Holmes saying: “What else is there to live for? Stand at the window here. Was ever such a dreary, dismal, unprofitable world? See how the yellow fog swirls down the street and drifts across the dun-coloured houses. What could be more hopelessly prosaic and material? What is the use of having powers, Doctor, when one has no field upon which to exert them? Crime is commonplace, existence is commonplace, and no qualities save those which are commonplace have any function upon earth.” And in “The Sign of Four” Holmes has said to Dr. Watson: “Do you know, Watson,” said he, “that it is one of the curses of a mind with a turn like mine that I must look at everything with reference to my own special subject. You look at these scattered houses, and you are impressed by their beauty. I look at them, and the only thought which comes to me is a feeling of their isolation and of the impunity with which crime may be committed there.” Both House and Holmes have this jaded and twisted view of society, and it’s a belief that is not without solid basis, given their own experiences with people.  For House, it’s the belief that “Everybody Lies.”  In the same manner that Holmes immediately see the possible crime scene in any location, House immediately looks for the inevitable lie in everything his patients say.   In “Three Stories” he tells a whole auditorium full of aspiring doctors: “It’s a basic truth of the human condition that everybody lies. The only variable is about what. The weird thing about telling someone they’re dying is it tends to focus their priorities. You find out what matters to them. What they’re willing to die for. What they’re willing to lie for.”  And yet for some reason, we see both House and Holmes constantly seeking the contrary, even if they do so unconsciously.  Daniel Bresson, one of House’s patients, even told him in “Unfaithful”: “I don’t think you’re looking for someone to prove you right. I think you’re looking for someone to prove you wrong, to give you hope. You want to believe, don’t you?” In many ways, both House’s and Holmes’ experiences with their respective clients and patients have only validated their pessimistic views.  But I also think that, while their views don’t necessarily change over time, they’re… edited, to incorporate the little nuances of hope that they see in every solved crime, and in every recuperating patient. Hope, after all, is what keeps them going.
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Permalink wastedyearswastedgain: House: You’re scared to death of losing anyone that matters, so you dump the person that matters the most to you!Wilson: I’m not scared to death, I’m moving forward!House: Because no one can take away from you what you no longer haveWilson: Your father’s death is about you, Amber’s death is about you, I can’t imagine why someone wouldn’t want to be your friend!House: Admit it, you’re angry and you’re scared of losing meWilson: I’m not angry, I’m not scaredHouse: Admit it!Wilson: I’m not afraidHouse: Admit it, admit itWilson: I’ve lost people, it happens!House: Admit itWilson: What are you, five? Stop repeatingHouse: Admit it, admit it, admit it, admit it, admit it, admit it, come on, admit it!
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Permalink mountainburd: blitzkriegcrow: reapersun: my bromance crushes ;w; well, before season “let’s talk about our relationship and why it will or won’t be awesome in every goddamn episode” aka season huddy  *gigglesnort* PRECIOUS *sighs happily* My ultimate bromances/friendship otp’s. And for them to actually meet is like a scene from my dreams. Oh why not? Why not, please please please will someone make it happen?
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to stand by your side, or to let you face the battle alone: friendship’s promise, revised once again.

behindtintedglass:

—

Don’t save my life. Don’t abandon me out of harm’s way. Though it means my death, let me stay by your side and face it with you. Don’t set me adrift again as the ghost you left behind, with every breath I take as one that you will not…

Once again I felt placed in the uncustomary seat of “big brother” and my “little brother” was asking for my protection against the only thing he had ever wanted to be protected from: my own sacrifice.

I had made many strong promises in my life, each one kept, even when it had nearly cost me everything, my life, even my very sanity, my sense of self. I could not tell him that I would never give my life to save his, because it was a promise I would never be able to keep. But still…

I smiled at him, closing my eyes and reopening them to reset the deadlock that had held our eyes together. “Sano, you and I, we can always face death together, anytime you like. I promise.”

—

Wilson cuts the engine and waits. The building stares back at them with the patience of a stone.

“Doing this on my own.” The words are so quiet that Wilson hardly hears them over the soft hush of rain and the pinging as the engine begins to cool. He looks from the car to the door and he thinks he gets it. A few more strides beneath the open sky, under his own volition; a last scrap of free will before House subjects himself to whatever comes next, within those walls.

They get out, their last exchanges made in silence. House’s watch is heavy and warm in Wilson’s palm.

If it were up to Wilson he would walk in with House, shoulder to shoulder into battle. But this fight is all House has left, and Wilson won’t force him to share it.

He’ll be manning the aid station instead, waiting for the wounded to come home.

—

Excerpts from Adrift by Khrysalis and Forty Yards by blackmare, respectively.

Permalink behindtintedglass: I recognized the quote even before I recognized the picture itself.  And I suddenly remembered why. I think one of the primary reasons why I had loved “House, M.D.” was precisely because, for quite some time, it was the only show that I felt had a distinct connection to and relevance with Sherlock Holmes, given that that the creator of the show, David Shore, openly admitted that Dr. Gregory House and Dr. James Wilson were patterned directly after Sherlock Holmes and John Watson.  And it’s questions like these, posed by Dr. Remy Hadley/Thirteen, that spark the same questions I’d like to ask Sherlock Holmes himself. There’s a hint of truth in what Thirteen is saying that I think is also applicable to Holmes.  In “The Adventure of the Copper Beeches” we hear Holmes saying: “What else is there to live for? Stand at the window here. Was ever such a dreary, dismal, unprofitable world? See how the yellow fog swirls down the street and drifts across the dun-coloured houses. What could be more hopelessly prosaic and material? What is the use of having powers, Doctor, when one has no field upon which to exert them? Crime is commonplace, existence is commonplace, and no qualities save those which are commonplace have any function upon earth.” And in “The Sign of Four” Holmes has said to Dr. Watson: “Do you know, Watson,” said he, “that it is one of the curses of a mind with a turn like mine that I must look at everything with reference to my own special subject. You look at these scattered houses, and you are impressed by their beauty. I look at them, and the only thought which comes to me is a feeling of their isolation and of the impunity with which crime may be committed there.” Both House and Holmes have this jaded and twisted view of society, and it’s a belief that is not without solid basis, given their own experiences with people.  For House, it’s the belief that “Everybody Lies.”  In the same manner that Holmes immediately see the possible crime scene in any location, House immediately looks for the inevitable lie in everything his patients say.   In “Three Stories” he tells a whole auditorium full of aspiring doctors: “It’s a basic truth of the human condition that everybody lies. The only variable is about what. The weird thing about telling someone they’re dying is it tends to focus their priorities. You find out what matters to them. What they’re willing to die for. What they’re willing to lie for.”  And yet for some reason, we see both House and Holmes constantly seeking the contrary, even if they do so unconsciously.  Daniel Bresson, one of House’s patients, even told him in “Unfaithful”: “I don’t think you’re looking for someone to prove you right. I think you’re looking for someone to prove you wrong, to give you hope. You want to believe, don’t you?” In many ways, both House’s and Holmes’ experiences with their respective clients and patients have only validated their pessimistic views.  But I also think that, while their views don’t necessarily change over time, they’re… edited, to incorporate the little nuances of hope that they see in every solved crime, and in every recuperating patient. Hope, after all, is what keeps them going.
Permalink behindtintedglass: And to continue on the vein of my sudden renewed interest in the parallelisms of House and Holmes, the graphic above reminds me of Wilson’s very striking words (in every sense) to House in “Private Lives”: Wilson: You weren’t looking for some big catharsis. You didn’t want to hug the guy. You just wanted to know how his head works. How he thinks.Because you’re not ordinary, House. You’re way out there on the fringe somewhere. I’m your best friend and half the time I don’t understand you. You’re alone. Been alone your whole life. When you read that book, you were hoping, that somewhere underneath all that talk of God, there would be a way of thinking, a mind that you could recognize. You wanted what we all want. To look across the gulf and know there is someone else like you. I believe Wilson’s words would have resonated with Holmes as well, especially because Holmes may as well have found his long lost intellectual kin in Moriarty as he “looked across the gulf” and discovered, to his great surprise, “someone else like him.” Elegant, novel, brilliant, I can’t be the only one who gets bored… we hear Sherlock say these words regarding Moriarty, and we hear a tinge of breathless fascination and awe in his voice, simply in the surprising idea that he’s not alone, that he’s not the only one of his kind in his world.  Paradoxically, it is the idea that he’s not as unique and different as he first thought that delights him, that makes him feel that finally, finally people can see that he’s not a freak— —only to have that thrown back in his face and suddenly realize for certain how dangerous having a brilliant mind is.  And that is heartbreaking for Sherlock. In a way, House is more fortunate than Holmes in this manner.  House has never seen the darker side of whom he can possibly become, the way Holmes has found in Moriarty.  And yet in a certain way, House is lonelier than Holmes as well.  Certainly both House and Holmes will always have Wilson and Watson respectively, but it’s just… not the same.  Wilson will always accept him for who he is, for sure.  But Wilson will never quite understand him. In a way, Sherlock has found that comfort in Moriarty. And yet perhaps it begs the question… for such singular men in their respective professions, what does House and Holmes need more?  Understanding or acceptance? Sometimes these are two separate things, even when at first they seem the same. “I’m a specialist, you see.  Like you.”